Netflix No Chill: My Thoughts on Meet the Patels

When I was a little girl I often thought about what it was like to be married. I watched my sister marry her high school sweetheart at 25 and then give birth to my nephew two years later and I wanted to have that too. Even as I grew older I still had that image in my mind- 25, wife, mother. At 19, a much older cousin told me that in order to have that, I needed a boyfriend right away and of course I’m like FUCK! How in the world was I going to get a boyfriend in the blink of an eye?! I was Rachel Green turning 30. I literally took a piece of paper and started to count the years. First I would have to meet him, we had to be friends for a while, date for a few years, get engaged, plan an extravagant wedding filled with white peonies and calla lilies, and let’s not forget the kid.

 Fast-forward 4 years, and marriage is the farthest thing from my mind. While I’m sure this has a lot to do with the fact that I have the worst luck with guys, I’d like to think that I’m not consumed with thoughts of marriage for two reasons:

  1. I’m more concerned with getting my career together.
  2. My parents don’t pressure me to get married or even think about marriage.

Even though I don’t obsess over marriage anymore, on some days I am a hopeless romantic who likes to watch Rom-Coms. Last week while enjoying a session of Netflix and Chill (hold the Chill), I came across a romantic comedy-esque documentary entitled Meet the PatelsMeet the Patels follows actor Ravi Patel (you may know him from Grandfathered and Master of None) as he struggles with the idea of finding love through arranged marriage- a common practice in his Indian culture, and the route his parents want him take.

As I watched Meet the Patels, I thought about whether or not I would be able to handle my parents pressuring me into marriage. The answer to that is a firm no. I couldn’t handle my parents pressuring me into marriage, nor could I handle them taking a hand in deciding who I’d marry- thats just too much meddling for me. Surely, I want my parents’ opinion, but thats as far as that goes. Ravi traveled to India and back- then made many trips across the US just to meet women who came across his biodata and who were recommended by his parents of course. If you are wondering what a biodata is, it is basically a resume with a photo and details like occupation, hobbies, horoscope, skin tone- oh and the location and occupation of your siblings and parents.

Ravi’s journey was definitely a learning experience for me. All cultures and households are unique. In my world YOU find someone you love, get married and hope for the best. As a Jamaican, I am not faced with as many rules/ expectations when it comes to marriage and I love that. I am nowhere near ready for marriage and motherhood.

 Meet the Patels is the one of only films I’ve watched on Netflix in its entirety, in one sitting. It was eye opening and educational on so many levels. While I can’t completely relate to Ravi’s experience; the film was still a good watch. I enjoyed it and would definitely recommend it for your next Netflix, no chill session!

Ashley FernComment